Jan. 6, 2026

Veteran Turned Social Worker Helps Find Resources and Resilience with Eleni Veneris-Whitehead

Veteran Turned Social Worker Helps Find Resources and Resilience with Eleni Veneris-Whitehead

Shoot me a message! We welcome Elaine Venez Whitehead, a veteran, spouse, Guard behavioral health officer, and LCSW, for a clear-eyed look at military families, hidden stress, and the resource map that too often stays invisible. We talk resilience without clichés, practical help for spouses and kids, and what growth looks like after hard truths. • veteran-to-social-worker journey and mission • what an LCSW does and why it matters • Guard behavioral health and readiness roles • realities behi...

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Season 4

Shoot me a message!

We welcome Elaine Venez Whitehead, a veteran, spouse, Guard behavioral health officer, and LCSW, for a clear-eyed look at military families, hidden stress, and the resource map that too often stays invisible. We talk resilience without clichés, practical help for spouses and kids, and what growth looks like after hard truths.

• veteran-to-social-worker journey and mission
• what an LCSW does and why it matters
• Guard behavioral health and readiness roles
• realities behind the curtain for spouses and kids
• the tribe model for support and access to care
• unseen stressors in relationships and reintegration
• abuse, stigma, and how to seek safe help
• school-based supports and USO community resources
• special education insights on behavior and emotion
• education, translation of MOS, and transition gaps
• concrete programs like Zero 800 and Operation Purple
• owning mistakes, building structure, and consistent growth

For everyone else out there, Formation Nation, remember survivability starts with awareness, and sometimes the strongest warriors are the ones holding the home front together

Links for Eleni:

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/eleni-venieris-whitehead-429890aa?utm_source=share_via&utm_content=profile&utm_medium=member_ios

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/homegrownecho?igsh=NTc4MTIwNjQ2YQ==

Veteran Resources:

 http://www.va.gov/

https://211la.org/

https://211sandiego.org/

https://www.sandiego.gov/public-library/services/outreach/vrc

https://dpss.lacounty.gov/en/community/veterans.html

https://www.campcorral.org/

https://www.militaryfamily.org/state-of-the-military-family-programs/operation-purple/operation-purple-camp/

https://www.uso.org/

Support the show

Check out our website

Please Support & Donate to the Podcast: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/themorningform

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Episode Powered By Act Now Education

00:00 - Welcome And Guest Introduction

02:42 - Elaine’s Path: Navy To Social Work

06:16 - LCSW Explained And Navy Roles

10:16 - Guard Behavioral Health And Readiness

14:01 - Stepping Out Of Comfort Zones

18:41 - Military Family Realities And Support

24:21 - Hidden Struggles And Community Ties

28:46 - Identity, Balance, And The Tribe

32:36 - The Unseen Stressors: Relationships

37:36 - Abuse, Stigma, And Getting Help

43:01 - Early Warning Signs And Outreach

47:06 - Special Education Lessons For Practice

52:16 - Why Social Work And Resource Map

57:06 - Advice To Recruits, Vets, And Spouses

01:02:41 - Transition Gaps And Life Skills

WEBVTT

00:00:58.410 --> 00:00:59.690
Warriors, fall in.

00:00:59.770 --> 00:01:00.969
It's time for formation.

00:01:01.130 --> 00:01:07.689
Today we're joined by someone who sits right at the intersection of education, military life, and family advocacy.

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She's a veteran, married to active duty, currently serving in the National Guard, a former special education teacher, and is now a social worker whose mission is to strengthen military family support systems and bring light to resources that often stay in the shadows.

00:01:22.570 --> 00:01:27.609
Formation Nation, I want you to please welcome Elaine Venez Whitehead to the show.

00:01:28.010 --> 00:01:29.370
Hi, everyone.

00:01:30.250 --> 00:01:31.689
Elaine, thank you so much.

00:01:31.849 --> 00:01:33.849
Um, I know we had some scheduling issues.

00:01:34.010 --> 00:01:37.849
You're a busy mother, you're in the National Guard, you have a full-time job.

00:01:38.090 --> 00:01:39.689
Um, I'm in the same boat.

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I mean, not the National Guard, but um just the hustle and bustle.

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I know you live here in Southern California now.

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Um I want you to share your share your origin story.

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What led you into military service and later into education and now social work?

00:01:56.330 --> 00:02:04.890
Oh my gosh, that is such an interesting story because I don't think anybody, well, I don't think many people have a straight path into military and then their next career plan, right?

00:02:05.049 --> 00:02:10.090
Everything takes a turn, a left life experiences derail us or motivate us.

00:02:10.329 --> 00:02:15.689
And for myself, I was just graduating high school and getting ready to go to university.

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And uh there was this guy, you know, dressed in all his whites, and he's like, hey, you could travel the world, you know.

00:02:23.129 --> 00:02:25.290
Uh, and I said, Well, why not?

00:02:25.530 --> 00:02:31.769
I joined up and one week later I was in uh, I don't want to age myself, but I went to Orlando for boot camp.

00:02:32.009 --> 00:02:36.409
And uh yeah, I got to serve in the Navy, and it was absolutely everything they said.

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I got to travel the world.

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I got my degrees for free.

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And um when I was ready, I went into the civilian life and I was teaching.

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And then I met my uh husband and then had kids, and I realized, you know, I wasn't done.

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There was more to give.

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And I went back to school.

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Again, the military paid for it.

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I got a master's in social work, and here I am as a social worker, and I went right back in the National Guard.

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I felt like, you know, everything that I've experienced and learned from my years in military, it was my, I mean, I don't want to sound trite, but I felt like it was my duty to go in and, you know, bring that and that support for other, you know, women and other service members.

00:03:25.610 --> 00:03:29.129
So that's how I ended up going back in the National Guard as a social worker.

00:03:29.530 --> 00:03:30.810
Here we are talking to you.

00:03:30.969 --> 00:03:31.610
This is amazing.

00:03:31.770 --> 00:03:32.009
Hi.

00:03:32.569 --> 00:03:35.210
That's a pretty awesome journey in itself.

00:03:35.449 --> 00:03:38.170
Um, you you're an LCSW, right?

00:03:38.409 --> 00:03:38.890
Yes.

00:03:39.210 --> 00:03:40.569
Can you explain what that is?

00:03:40.969 --> 00:03:41.129
Sure.

00:03:41.289 --> 00:03:43.770
A licensed clinical social worker, there are many steps.

00:03:43.849 --> 00:04:00.170
So first you go to school for your master's in social work, and then you're a brand new graduate in the world, and you get an associate uh license where you get to work under licensed supervisors for 3,000 hours you are trained.

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And then after that, you take an exam to become clinically licensed.

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But even then, you're still learning.

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It's nonstop.

00:04:09.050 --> 00:04:13.210
You constantly go to continue education courses and you continue to build.

00:04:13.849 --> 00:04:15.370
Wow, it sounds like a lot of work.

00:04:16.170 --> 00:04:18.649
Many years, many years to get here.

00:04:19.289 --> 00:04:22.170
So when you served in the Navy, what was your MOS?

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I did a few things.

00:04:23.689 --> 00:04:28.009
I was admin and I also was a 9545.

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For people who don't know, that's kind of like military police, law enforcement.

00:04:33.370 --> 00:04:33.689
Okay.

00:04:34.330 --> 00:04:36.810
Yeah, don't they call that a master of arms or something like that?

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They do.

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So there's two different types.

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Military is very unique in its way, and the Navy is even more unique.

00:04:43.449 --> 00:04:51.610
So you can get your MOS, which is one job, and then you can cross-train into another and serve in that for a few periods of time.

00:04:51.769 --> 00:04:53.529
It could be a temporary assignment.

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So there are those that are master at arms, that's their permanent MOS.

00:04:57.850 --> 00:05:08.649
And then 9545 is also law enforcement, but you're technically supposed to be there just for a few years, but some of us can stay for quite some time.

00:05:09.210 --> 00:05:09.689
Hmm.

00:05:09.930 --> 00:05:10.730
That's interesting.

00:05:10.889 --> 00:05:12.170
The Navy is quite different.

00:05:12.330 --> 00:05:18.889
Um, I remember I did a when I was in the Army, I did a joint exercise with uh the Navy in Pearl Harbor.

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And whenever I would make a phone call, I would say, This is Captain Phillips.

00:05:23.769 --> 00:05:27.850
And they they like would freak out, like, oh yes, sir, yes, sir.

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And I'm like, no, no, Army captain, like an O3.

00:05:30.889 --> 00:05:32.889
And they're like, oh, okay, what do you want?

00:05:33.290 --> 00:05:36.569
But it's just funny how the rank system and everything is so different in there.

00:05:36.730 --> 00:05:40.329
But um, currently with the National Guard, uh, what capacity are you serving?

00:05:40.649 --> 00:05:45.050
As a behavioral health officer, I am a social worker for the Army National Guard.

00:05:45.370 --> 00:05:46.089
That's really cool.

00:05:46.250 --> 00:05:49.050
So do you work in a hospital or do you work in a clinical setting?

00:05:49.209 --> 00:05:51.530
Like, is it one one week in a month gig?

00:05:52.089 --> 00:05:52.490
Yes.

00:05:52.649 --> 00:05:55.769
So it's generally one week in a month, two weeks a year.

00:05:56.009 --> 00:05:57.930
But here in California, it's very interesting.

00:05:58.009 --> 00:06:00.329
I work in what they call a medical detachment.

00:06:00.730 --> 00:06:09.689
And it's unique in that it's the only unit that helps assign uh service members that are coming back or going on deployments.

00:06:09.850 --> 00:06:13.610
We do readiness uh assessments and things like that.

00:06:13.850 --> 00:06:20.089
So technically we're non-deployable, but most recently some of us were deployed to provide assistance.

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So it's very unique.

00:06:22.410 --> 00:06:24.009
The guard's own animal.

00:06:24.810 --> 00:06:25.449
That is very cool.

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Like I didn't know the guard even had anything like that when I was in the enlisted in the National Guard.

00:06:30.170 --> 00:06:34.009
Like I didn't I never saw social workers on the weekends.

00:06:34.569 --> 00:06:37.689
Um, so that's pretty pretty unique job in itself.

00:06:37.850 --> 00:06:44.410
And before I go on, I want to um commend you for this is your first podcast.

00:06:44.970 --> 00:06:48.089
This is your first time really publishing yourself out there.

00:06:48.170 --> 00:06:52.089
And shout out to Gina for uh recommending you to me.

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I love the fact that you haven't been on a podcast before, you haven't done anything like this before, but you're stepping forward of the line and you're actually putting yourself out there to talk to me today.

00:07:01.769 --> 00:07:05.610
So much respect to you, Elaine, for doing that.

00:07:05.689 --> 00:07:07.290
Um, it takes a lot of courage to do this.

00:07:07.370 --> 00:07:12.089
I've been doing this for four years now, and um, it's it's a learning experience each and every time.

00:07:12.170 --> 00:07:14.730
And I love talking to people like you who are brand new.

00:07:15.050 --> 00:07:17.290
Well, I really appreciate the support.

00:07:17.449 --> 00:07:21.209
And moreover, I feel like this is just an extension of being a social worker.

00:07:21.290 --> 00:07:26.089
If I'm constantly telling people that in order to grow, you have to move yourself out of your comfort zone.

00:07:26.329 --> 00:07:32.490
So I want to say thank you for letting me feel safe in taking my own advice, like growing outside of my comfort zone.

00:07:32.569 --> 00:07:34.730
This is uh this is really unique and different.

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And I won't lie if I'm not a little nervous.

00:07:38.089 --> 00:07:40.250
Social media is really a force multiplier.

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I mean, you could see your clients and maybe deal with three, four, or five people, but when you do something like this, you're able to sort of expand your horizons and really shoot out the message to a lot of folks at one time.

00:07:54.089 --> 00:08:00.250
And I think social media is used in in good ways, bad ways, dangerous ways, and everything in between.

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So it's refreshing that I'm I'm seeing people like you stepping up and actually putting yourself out there, utilizing your experiences and your and your education, your knowledge to help our community out.

00:08:11.930 --> 00:08:13.209
Cause I think it's really important.

00:08:13.689 --> 00:08:13.930
Yeah.

00:08:14.089 --> 00:08:14.970
And same to you.

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Without your platform, uh just reaching one other service member who can say, Yeah, I get that, and reach out for support and get what they need, or just hear a kindred spirit, what you're doing laying the groundwork, just so I can do this.

00:08:31.850 --> 00:08:33.769
I want to say thank you for that.

00:08:34.009 --> 00:08:35.210
Yeah, absolutely.

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Absolutely, absolute honor on my end.

00:08:38.490 --> 00:08:47.850
Um so getting back to talking about you, um what is what is serving while being in the military?

00:08:48.009 --> 00:09:04.250
Um, and what what is serving in the military and being married to an active duty service member taught you about the realities of military families, military spouses, the things that they face that civilians rarely see?

00:09:04.649 --> 00:09:09.529
So military families are usually really hidden behind the curtain.

00:09:09.769 --> 00:09:31.529
So we see a lot of in the media happy families, you know, their spouses, whether they're male or female, supporting their service member as they go off, but they don't see the details behind that, like all the mental labor and the emotional labor and the fact that many of them are without their support systems that they've known because that is the nature of the beast of the military.

00:09:31.690 --> 00:09:33.049
They move you and things like that.

00:09:33.289 --> 00:09:35.930
I will give the military a lot of credit.

00:09:36.009 --> 00:09:45.769
In the last um decade, they've really stepped up in providing family readiness groups, providing more social workers that are access to them on bases.

00:09:45.930 --> 00:09:53.130
And for example, here in the San Diego area, the DoD has contracted where we have social workers in schools.

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So they have um family clubs, and it's not focused on just mental health and things like that.

00:09:59.289 --> 00:10:09.769
It's just engaging to let other kids know that there are other kids just like them and to have access to resources when and if the family members are interested.

00:10:09.930 --> 00:10:10.730
So that's nice.

00:10:10.890 --> 00:10:13.529
There's always access to care in that way.

00:10:14.009 --> 00:10:27.690
And going back to your first question about the arc of being, you know, young and enlisted and just living life and then getting out and getting married to someone in the service, it's it's a 180.

00:10:27.769 --> 00:10:34.809
It's completely different because when you're in, you're the one that's being addressed and taken care of.

00:10:35.049 --> 00:10:41.609
When you're the spouse, you have to have your spouse's social for this, your spouse's approval for that.

00:10:41.769 --> 00:10:45.529
And it's just jarring to your autonomy.

00:10:45.609 --> 00:10:49.769
You know, you're like, wait a minute, I'm the one asking for this.

00:10:50.009 --> 00:10:52.250
You don't need his permission, you know.

00:10:52.410 --> 00:10:54.569
But that's again the nature of the beast.

00:10:54.650 --> 00:10:58.650
It's designed to support the service member and then the service member's family.

00:10:58.730 --> 00:11:00.410
So you kind of have to fall in line.

00:11:00.890 --> 00:11:10.490
And it gives you, when you're in and you're witnessing young families form, you develop these perceptions of, oh, why can't they do this or why can't they do that?

00:11:10.569 --> 00:11:14.089
And then you realize when you're the spouse, oh, there's these barriers.

00:11:14.250 --> 00:11:16.329
Who's gonna help with the kids so you can go to school?

00:11:16.490 --> 00:11:18.809
Who's gonna help watch the kids while you go to work?

00:11:18.970 --> 00:11:29.529
Um, the hours, you know, because you're uh essentially in many cases single parenting, not because the spouse is absent, they don't want to be there, because they're absent because they're serving their country.

00:11:29.769 --> 00:11:34.490
So you have to navigate if the kid is sick, you're missing work, you're doing this, you're doing that after school.

00:11:34.730 --> 00:11:40.809
So um when I was in, I got to see the flip side where spouses really supported each other.

00:11:41.049 --> 00:11:44.809
You find that, you find your tribe everywhere you go.

00:11:45.130 --> 00:11:48.890
So in this case, Gina was one of my tribe members.

00:11:49.130 --> 00:11:54.170
Um we would help watch each other's kids, you know, if I was running late.

00:11:54.410 --> 00:11:55.690
She's phenomenal.

00:11:55.849 --> 00:11:57.849
Um, she's fitness oriented.

00:11:58.009 --> 00:12:00.490
So, like I didn't have time to go to the gym.

00:12:00.569 --> 00:12:00.890
Guess what?

00:12:00.970 --> 00:12:06.089
I just ran over to her house, used her gym, didn't even have to say hi, what's up, just used it and left.

00:12:06.170 --> 00:12:06.809
It was amazing.

00:12:06.890 --> 00:12:07.849
It was such a gift.

00:12:08.089 --> 00:12:11.529
So um, in that way, it just gives you a different perspective.

00:12:11.690 --> 00:12:19.690
And then going back into a service capacity as a social worker helping other military families, it like brings it full circle.

00:12:19.769 --> 00:12:26.089
You get to see it from all different angles, from the enlisted person to the married person to their kids.

00:12:26.250 --> 00:12:31.289
And it's it's been um for me a huge mindset growth.

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You know, you get to see in most cases, you only see things 2D from your perspective, your job.

00:12:36.890 --> 00:12:44.410
And in my case, and it's very selfish to say this and spoiling, but I got to see it from essentially 4D, like all the way around.

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And I think it's really helped humble me, help me grow, and just really motivate me even more to tell people, hey, there's these resources out there.

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You know, how can I support you to support yourself and then you can help others?

00:12:57.130 --> 00:12:59.450
You know, that's that's essentially it.

00:12:59.849 --> 00:13:04.890
I think it's great to be a resource hub for sure, and to pass on that information to others.

00:13:05.049 --> 00:13:11.609
I I really don't vibe with people that have information, but they're not willing to share with others.

00:13:11.769 --> 00:13:13.289
They try to keep it to themselves.

00:13:13.529 --> 00:13:22.730
So it's always nice to talk to folks like yourself who are willing to kind of absorb those resources, but then also kick them out to people that that need them.

00:13:22.890 --> 00:13:30.250
Because a lot of times, just like the military, I was just talking to someone the other day about how they joined the military and how they got commissioned and everything.

00:13:30.410 --> 00:13:42.009
And he said, Yeah, I got commissioned through this program, SMP program, by having a casual conversation with an NCO, and it just came up.

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And it's like, that's how you find out about some of the best uh programs, the best resources, the best ways to get to where you want to go in your journey.

00:13:51.210 --> 00:13:59.130
Um the uh what you were talking about earlier about how the military family a lot of times is behind the curtain.

00:13:59.210 --> 00:14:12.730
Um, I remember about three years ago, somebody was doing a um, it was um a documentary on military brats, military dependence, growing up as a child that whose parents are active duty.

00:14:12.970 --> 00:14:19.529
And they wanted, and it was a positive spin, it was a positive thing about being a military brat.

00:14:20.170 --> 00:14:27.690
And I remember they they kept asking me to be a part of it, and I was like, no, like I don't want to be a part of it.

00:14:27.849 --> 00:14:36.809
And and the reason was was because I didn't have a good experience like as a military brat growing up in the military.

00:14:37.049 --> 00:14:40.009
My my parents were domestically not good.

00:14:40.329 --> 00:14:43.289
Um we were moving around every four years.

00:14:43.529 --> 00:14:52.490
So, like you said, I mean, but from everyone else's perspectives, they thought things were great, things were good, and they really weren't.

00:14:52.730 --> 00:15:00.970
And you can hide those those skeletons and those demons a lot easier when you're moving every four years and nobody can really keep up with you.

00:15:01.210 --> 00:15:04.809
Um, so it's it's interesting that that you had mentioned that.

00:15:04.890 --> 00:15:07.289
And uh another thing you mentioned too is the resources.

00:15:07.450 --> 00:15:15.769
When I was in the military, I feel like before the the prime internet age, um, it was really hard to connect with people.

00:15:15.930 --> 00:15:16.329
Yeah.

00:15:16.650 --> 00:15:19.369
But now you're able to connect so much, so much more.

00:15:19.609 --> 00:15:23.609
I mean, would I mean you and I connected through social media in a sense, right?

00:15:24.410 --> 00:15:24.890
Exactly.

00:15:25.049 --> 00:15:31.130
We would have we don't run in the same circles, we don't, but like it's like the ripples, you know.

00:15:31.450 --> 00:15:40.329
I feel like uh I don't remember who it was that told me that it's like no matter where you go, if you run into a fellow service member, the likelihood is they've got your back.

00:15:40.490 --> 00:15:41.690
They don't know who you are.

00:15:41.930 --> 00:15:50.490
You may not even have ever known them, may not even like them in the real world, but in those settings, no matter what, they'll have your back.

00:15:50.890 --> 00:15:52.970
And uh it's amazing.

00:15:53.210 --> 00:15:55.769
And for me, that's a gift.

00:15:55.930 --> 00:16:03.849
I could go anywhere and if I need and raise the flag that someone I know will know someone where I'm at and they will help.

00:16:04.009 --> 00:16:04.809
That's the key.

00:16:04.970 --> 00:16:05.130
Yeah.

00:16:05.369 --> 00:16:05.849
That's the key.

00:16:06.250 --> 00:16:11.529
We're truly, we're truly the real minorities when it comes to um talking about groups.

00:16:11.609 --> 00:16:21.210
I mean, you know, they always say like less than six percent of the US population ever serve in the military, and even less than that are you know, combat-related veterans.

00:16:21.369 --> 00:16:23.769
So it's it were a really small group.

00:16:23.849 --> 00:16:29.769
Um, and I think sometimes we don't really realize how how unique we really are as a population.

00:16:30.250 --> 00:16:30.569
Yeah.

00:16:31.049 --> 00:16:48.650
I want to kind of add on that of the six percent, then one percent, a majority of that are either firstborn uh American citizens or they are absolutely children and uh here by immigrant parents as well.

00:16:49.210 --> 00:17:10.970
So I just say that I find the most patriotic people are the ones that have learned that this country is unique in the way that it supports its supported, its immigrant um community because without them there'd be no growth.

00:17:11.210 --> 00:17:31.849
So I really want to highlight that my parents are proud to have come here and I'm very fortunate to have been born here, and I was raised with the fact that here they were able to accomplish so much more than they would have ever accomplished back home.

00:17:32.089 --> 00:17:35.049
And that instilled with me such great pride.

00:17:35.210 --> 00:17:53.289
Like I believe in the American dream, and I and I truly believe that this country is open to those who want to be better because we are all different, and the difference is what makes us so gives us strength.

00:17:53.690 --> 00:17:54.089
Yeah.

00:17:54.329 --> 00:17:56.809
Well, I mean, we're the most migrated country in the world.

00:17:56.970 --> 00:18:01.929
I mean, everyone wants to come to the US, and it's because of it's a l, it is truly the land of opportunity.

00:18:02.169 --> 00:18:02.329
Yes.

00:18:02.569 --> 00:18:08.490
But a lot of times people that already that are already born here and already live here really take it for granted.

00:18:08.649 --> 00:18:16.169
And uh there are so many other countries where wherever you're born, whoever you're born into, family-wise, that there you are.

00:18:16.649 --> 00:18:20.409
You'll never this is your ceiling, and you'll never exceed that ceiling.

00:18:20.569 --> 00:18:20.809
Yes.

00:18:20.970 --> 00:18:25.210
And my dad growing up was always like, you gotta do what you gotta do to get where you want to go.

00:18:25.369 --> 00:18:36.169
And that was my mentality um growing up was I I'm gonna have to eat shit while I'm young so that I can enjoy myself while I'm older, and that's just how it's gonna be.

00:18:36.409 --> 00:18:36.730
Yeah.

00:18:36.970 --> 00:18:39.529
Um You know, you you made so many sacrifices.

00:18:39.690 --> 00:18:47.849
You're you're currently serving in the National Guard, um despite everything else that you've done and you're working full-time as a social worker.

00:18:48.009 --> 00:18:53.849
How do you balance the identity with being a spouse, a mom, uh, and a professional?

00:18:54.169 --> 00:18:57.529
So I uh the I gosh.

00:18:57.769 --> 00:19:03.129
Whew, sorry, I get tongue-tied on this one because I'm gonna say something that's really unpopular.

00:19:03.369 --> 00:19:05.609
I don't believe in work-life balance.

00:19:05.769 --> 00:19:07.529
Like it's not real.

00:19:07.690 --> 00:19:08.809
It comes and it goes.

00:19:08.970 --> 00:19:15.769
Sometimes you're like, I got this, the kids are all in order, everything's one, two, three, and then everything goes left of center.

00:19:15.929 --> 00:19:21.369
And you have to realize that you cannot carry everything 100%, 100% of the time.

00:19:21.529 --> 00:19:31.049
So I'm very fortunate that the guard is weekends, or sometimes when they request like duty personnel to come on board to support missions that are going on.

00:19:31.369 --> 00:19:33.769
That is um an opportunity.

00:19:33.849 --> 00:19:36.649
And when I'm able to, we'll engage in that.

00:19:36.970 --> 00:19:39.129
And again, it comes down to your tribe.

00:19:39.289 --> 00:19:45.529
Who's with you, who's supporting you, what resources are there after school activities and stuff like that.

00:19:45.769 --> 00:19:52.889
Um, I think that's the biggest thing to remember is that no one succeeds on their own ever.

00:19:53.049 --> 00:19:53.210
Right.

00:19:53.369 --> 00:20:00.970
And if you ever meet someone and they're like, I got here because I did all the work, they're really missing out on the people who supported them along the way.

00:20:01.049 --> 00:20:02.730
And that's a big sign for me.

00:20:02.970 --> 00:20:03.289
Yeah.

00:20:03.609 --> 00:20:10.970
So so many people have gone to bat for me over the years, and I'm so blessed and thankful for that, for people supporting me and being in my corner.

00:20:11.049 --> 00:20:14.809
But you will have your small space of haters, right?

00:20:14.970 --> 00:20:15.929
As we all do.

00:20:16.169 --> 00:20:28.009
Uh, I experienced that this week as well when I posted a reel and it talked about how sometimes your trauma and your issues are deeper than your military service, but they actually go back to your childhood.

00:20:28.250 --> 00:20:38.009
And I don't know, I know you're not on Instagram or anything like that, but somebody commented and said that uh ended up saying that I was predatory and that I'm taking advantage of veterans and all these different things.

00:20:38.089 --> 00:20:41.690
And I'm like, I don't even sell a service, but um Yeah.

00:20:42.009 --> 00:20:47.929
It's uh it's it's one of those things when you where you put yourself out there, you're gonna have your support and then you're gonna have your haters at the same time.

00:20:48.089 --> 00:20:49.929
But um It's true.

00:20:50.009 --> 00:20:56.329
Um what do you think are the most common unseen stressors uh military families deal with that people don't?

00:20:56.970 --> 00:20:57.690
Talk about enough.

00:20:58.089 --> 00:20:59.769
Oh, relationships for real.

00:21:00.089 --> 00:21:09.369
You know, when you're so busy being the service member, your hyper focus is your safety, your everything that you need to do for that mission.

00:21:09.609 --> 00:21:15.369
Even if it doesn't matter your job in the military, you're hyper focused in that, um, in getting that done.

00:21:15.529 --> 00:21:17.690
You've got all these responsibilities over here.

00:21:17.849 --> 00:21:25.690
And then you have a spouse and you have kids and they have needs and they have wants, and you're trying to carry that, it's very difficult.

00:21:25.849 --> 00:21:36.809
So I think the biggest thing is relationships, learning how to downshift from your job into your essentially real life.

00:21:37.210 --> 00:21:39.690
And there is this disconnect.

00:21:39.929 --> 00:21:45.529
And sometimes military spouses expect the other person, oh, that's your job now.

00:21:45.690 --> 00:21:48.490
You carry that, you have the kids, you do this.

00:21:48.649 --> 00:21:50.169
My job is the military.

00:21:50.329 --> 00:21:51.049
I'm busy.

00:21:51.289 --> 00:22:00.329
So it's kind of like changing that mindset, being like, no, it takes two to create something and it takes two to continue to build that.

00:22:00.490 --> 00:22:06.730
You can't have one person um trying to build something and the other person digging underneath you.

00:22:06.889 --> 00:22:10.409
So it's really important to be mindful of that.

00:22:10.569 --> 00:22:17.289
I think the biggest thing is um changing as your family changes.

00:22:17.609 --> 00:22:18.889
Maybe I could say that better.

00:22:18.970 --> 00:22:19.929
How can I say that better?

00:22:20.089 --> 00:22:26.009
Um, so just like who you are um five years ago isn't who you are today.

00:22:26.169 --> 00:22:26.329
Right.

00:22:26.649 --> 00:22:28.409
Same things with relationships.

00:22:28.569 --> 00:22:39.929
You know, you begin one way, and as they build and as they change and they become more dynamic, it's important that we as individuals build, grow, and change with that dynamic.

00:22:40.089 --> 00:22:44.649
If we stay stagnant, then relationships don't get that support.

00:22:44.730 --> 00:22:47.289
They don't get watered, and then they get neglected.

00:22:47.450 --> 00:22:50.009
And that can be very difficult.

00:22:50.250 --> 00:22:58.169
So I think that's the greatest challenge for military members is um having access to relationship growth.

00:22:58.409 --> 00:22:58.730
Yeah.

00:22:59.049 --> 00:23:04.009
That makes it's funny you said that because I wrote stagnant down as before you said it.

00:23:04.409 --> 00:23:08.089
Um that's real interesting because I was talking to somebody this week about that.

00:23:08.329 --> 00:23:13.049
That sometimes it could be friends, family, significant other.

00:23:13.529 --> 00:23:21.609
Um, doesn't matter, but at some point in time in your path, you may decide that you want growth and you don't want to stay stagnant anymore.

00:23:21.769 --> 00:23:21.929
Yeah.

00:23:22.089 --> 00:23:23.929
And even friends, friends are the same way too.

00:23:24.009 --> 00:23:24.809
Friends come and go.

00:23:24.889 --> 00:23:26.809
Some stay around forever, some don't.

00:23:27.049 --> 00:23:28.490
Family, same thing.

00:23:28.649 --> 00:23:37.289
I mean, you may have some family members that are happy in their spot and they're stagnant, and then they see you trying to grow, and they're like, what the hell are you doing over here?

00:23:37.450 --> 00:23:37.690
Yeah.

00:23:37.929 --> 00:23:42.329
Like, that's weird to me, and I want nothing to do with that, and I don't support you.

00:23:42.649 --> 00:23:45.129
And so I've experienced that over the years.

00:23:45.289 --> 00:23:48.809
Like, even doing this podcast, you know, it's it's amazing.

00:23:49.609 --> 00:23:52.490
Well, it's evident in that person that left that comment to you.

00:23:52.649 --> 00:23:57.690
I mean, what's their motivation to say that someone supporting somebody else would be predatory?

00:23:57.849 --> 00:24:03.769
That tells me that's just a reflection on where they are and who they are in this moment.

00:24:04.490 --> 00:24:05.690
Um Yeah.

00:24:05.929 --> 00:24:11.929
And it was the the comment also had to do with um whining and victim mentality.

00:24:12.250 --> 00:24:20.009
And at the end of the day, from my experience, I did not take accountability.

00:24:20.169 --> 00:24:25.769
And it led to divorce, it led to a lot of downfall for me.

00:24:25.849 --> 00:24:29.609
And I had to hit bottom before I started coming back up again.

00:24:29.849 --> 00:24:31.529
And I had to look in the mirror.

00:24:31.769 --> 00:24:34.009
And that's where that that that's where that comment came from.

00:24:34.089 --> 00:24:35.690
And that guy doesn't understand that.

00:24:36.009 --> 00:24:36.569
Yeah.

00:24:37.210 --> 00:24:37.529
Yeah.

00:24:37.849 --> 00:24:39.049
That's the biggest thing.

00:24:39.129 --> 00:24:52.329
Um, I think to one of the things that really helped me get into social work and move forward and provide that support is I think we as individuals, when we recognize there's a problem, then the ownership does become on us.

00:24:52.490 --> 00:25:07.929
The minute we know um childhood trauma, adult trauma, military trauma, anything, when we recognize that's impacting our lives and how we affect others, it becomes our responsibility to build that growth.

00:25:08.089 --> 00:25:08.970
But you're right.

00:25:09.210 --> 00:25:10.649
We as humans, we're humans.

00:25:10.730 --> 00:25:11.450
We get stuck.

00:25:11.609 --> 00:25:13.769
There's a reason why they we have the cycle.

00:25:13.929 --> 00:25:17.129
We have motivation, we have stagnation, and there's a reason for that.

00:25:17.210 --> 00:25:17.929
We do get stuck.

00:25:18.009 --> 00:25:25.769
And sometimes it takes an outside uh intrinsic force to move us along, or it becomes internal that makes that happen.

00:25:25.929 --> 00:25:33.769
But without that, we not only lose ourselves, like you said, we do lose our peers and sometimes our family.

00:25:34.089 --> 00:25:39.529
So uh it sounds like you have a very interesting story, you know, with growth and everything else like that.

00:25:39.690 --> 00:25:48.730
And, you know, giving that insight will help maybe somebody else who has or in the moment right now, losing their family or going through a struggle.

00:25:48.889 --> 00:25:52.329
If they hear yours, they can be like, wait, I can learn from that.

00:25:52.490 --> 00:25:58.329
Let me grab that resource, let me kind of like change course before I too hit rock bottom.

00:25:58.490 --> 00:26:02.889
So you doing that, putting yourself out there, that's amazing.

00:26:02.970 --> 00:26:03.210
Yeah.

00:26:03.769 --> 00:26:04.649
I have no shame.

00:26:04.809 --> 00:26:26.569
I, you know, and and the way I see it, Eleni, is like this like, you know, we're we've we've gone through so much, and we can keep our experiences and our lessons learned to ourselves, or we could share it with others in hopes that somebody that's behind us in age or behind us in career or wherever can hear it and maybe zig versus zag.

00:26:27.129 --> 00:26:30.329
And that's what I want, you know, out of all this entire podcast stuff.

00:26:30.409 --> 00:26:35.289
So I that's why like people like you that are on doing this stuff, I really am appreciative of you.

00:26:35.450 --> 00:26:35.849
Yeah.

00:26:36.169 --> 00:26:48.730
I think uh one of the things I learned from childhood is that you can try and hide all mistakes or all growth or whatever, but if you own it, nobody can own you.

00:26:48.970 --> 00:26:49.609
Yeah.

00:26:49.849 --> 00:26:51.289
Everyone makes mistakes.

00:26:51.529 --> 00:26:53.929
Everyone has um a right to growth.

00:26:54.250 --> 00:26:58.329
And no, and not everyone has to either forgive you for those mistakes.

00:26:58.490 --> 00:27:04.970
You know, your job is to grow yourself and move forward and recognize that and own it.

00:27:05.289 --> 00:27:08.730
And uh once you do, that's it.

00:27:08.970 --> 00:27:13.690
Someone can say, Oh, you did this, and you're like, Yeah, I did, but I'm not doing that now.

00:27:13.929 --> 00:27:14.250
Yeah.

00:27:14.490 --> 00:27:14.809
Yeah.

00:27:15.049 --> 00:27:15.769
That's very true.

00:27:16.169 --> 00:27:16.970
Growth is important.

00:27:17.129 --> 00:27:18.970
We can't keep dragging people down.

00:27:19.529 --> 00:27:20.089
Right, right.

00:27:20.250 --> 00:27:25.369
And even if you don't want to grow and you want to be stagnant, like understand what they're doing.

00:27:25.529 --> 00:27:29.609
Understand that their journey and their path is going in a different direction, and you have a choice.

00:27:29.769 --> 00:27:39.210
You could either watch and you could support, but you don't have to like deny and say, well, that's not gonna work, and I want nothing to do with you, and I'm not it's just there's no, there's no point in that.

00:27:39.289 --> 00:27:43.210
Because I see people that do different things all the time, and I'm like, good for you, man.

00:27:43.289 --> 00:27:44.250
Like, go for it.

00:27:44.409 --> 00:27:45.369
Like, kill it.

00:27:45.450 --> 00:27:55.450
I understand that you're trying to grow your business, you're trying to brand yourself, you're trying to, you know, do different things, but um just want to bring it back to the family systems that you talk that you that you mentioned about.

00:27:55.690 --> 00:28:02.970
And um, you know, when you talk about family support systems, well, like what does that mean in the military context?

00:28:03.769 --> 00:28:09.210
So again, like some of the bases, they have family readiness officers, social workers on site.

00:28:09.369 --> 00:28:11.289
They have lots of resources as well.

00:28:11.450 --> 00:28:15.049
And but the biggest one is nonprofits.

00:28:15.369 --> 00:28:20.409
So a lot of military service members, such as yourself, they go out and they start nonprofits, they're family.

00:28:20.569 --> 00:28:24.250
There's one in particular I'd like to highlight called Zero 800.

00:28:24.409 --> 00:28:42.649
They help younger enlisted service members one year prior to getting out of the military and up to three years after, because there is a huge transition between, you know, settling in, rediscovering how to get a new home loan, or navigating jobs and writing resumes.

00:28:42.809 --> 00:28:48.250
And in this economy, even the basics as food and uh school supplies.

00:28:48.409 --> 00:28:50.490
So that is a great uh opportunity.

00:28:50.730 --> 00:29:04.009
There are several others that also promote, like um, we were talking earlier when I said the biggest barrier right now is how families communicate because of all the different just, you know, families are gone for like six months at a time.

00:29:04.089 --> 00:29:06.009
How do you reintegrate, re-spark?

00:29:06.250 --> 00:29:14.809
So they have uh even after you get out, uh, groups where it will take you out for family engagement, get you back together.

00:29:14.970 --> 00:29:17.049
They do couples retreats, things like that.

00:29:17.210 --> 00:29:30.649
So, my biggest uh suggestion is one if you're a veteran and you're connected with the VA, I'd reach out to the VA and speak to their social workers, see what resources are available for you, and also just really utilize that search engine.

00:29:30.889 --> 00:29:31.849
Look around.

00:29:32.089 --> 00:29:40.009
There are hundreds, I mean, literally hundreds of nonprofits in San Diego alone, and that will provide resources.

00:29:40.089 --> 00:29:42.169
There are several also in the LA area.

00:29:42.329 --> 00:29:44.169
They work together hand in hand.

00:29:44.329 --> 00:29:48.169
You'll see they do school drives, holiday drives.

00:29:48.409 --> 00:29:51.289
If there is a need, there is a resource.

00:29:51.450 --> 00:29:58.889
And I really just encourage you to know that you are not alone, and it's never too late to ask for help.

00:29:59.450 --> 00:29:59.690
Yeah.

00:30:00.089 --> 00:30:02.889
A lot of it, a lot of it is just marketing, getting it out there.

00:30:03.129 --> 00:30:03.289
Yes.

00:30:03.609 --> 00:30:14.169
I've been a uh uh board member for a nonprofit for four years now, and it is such a challenge just to pass the word to others about the program.

00:30:14.569 --> 00:30:16.730
I mean, I have a podcast and I struggle.

00:30:16.970 --> 00:30:24.409
I mean, every every podcast episode, I mention the nonprofit that I'm a part of, but I don't do enough still to let everyone know about it.

00:30:24.569 --> 00:30:31.210
Um so that's the biggest challenge is getting it from like communicative-wise to the actual people that need it the most.

00:30:31.289 --> 00:30:33.690
Um there.

00:30:34.730 --> 00:30:46.730
Would you um would you agree that um military households oftentimes like experience financial, emotional, and physical abuse that would go like unreported or unnoticed?

00:30:47.129 --> 00:30:48.169
Yeah, absolutely.

00:30:48.329 --> 00:31:28.169
And it boils down to perception, you know, and the people experiencing it are often in shame because we as military spouses, we uh strive oh gosh, we strive to be everything that uh really encapsulates what it means to be that service member spouse, you know, um, just providing all that support, having the home ready, navigating the kids, having a job, you know, just having it all and maintaining really great mental health.

00:31:29.049 --> 00:31:32.089
And you we all know we can't do that alone.

00:31:32.490 --> 00:31:41.609
And um and sometimes we're taught to um find reasons why we shouldn't share that.

00:31:41.690 --> 00:31:43.049
You know, what would they think?

00:31:43.210 --> 00:31:44.569
You'll get in trouble.

00:31:44.809 --> 00:31:55.769
A lot of people believe um erroneously that APS and CPS is out to uh really interfere with your life or take your kids or anything like that.

00:31:55.929 --> 00:32:07.450
But I I really do encourage if they if anyone sees something to say something, because a CPS, for example, just focusing on CPS, their job is to provide supports.

00:32:07.609 --> 00:32:14.169
So if they go in the home and they see maybe there's a food need or a clothing need, they provide that resource.

00:32:14.329 --> 00:32:22.490
They're not there to judge that family, they're not there to take that family's kids, they're really there to provide support.

00:32:22.649 --> 00:32:28.809
The number one goal is to always uh ensure the kids are safe and that they get those resources.

00:32:29.210 --> 00:32:37.049
Um and I would encourage anyone that is struggling to seek out therapeutic support.

00:32:37.289 --> 00:32:49.450
And if they're not comfortable going to the military or they feel abandoned by the military, that there are some, again, nonprofits, like the Jewish Family Service Centers.

00:32:49.609 --> 00:32:57.129
They have amazing uh domestic violence resources uh for military families as well.

00:32:57.769 --> 00:33:09.609
And the key here is sometimes military families will gaslight themselves and not recognize that what they're going through is verbal, emotional, or financial abuse.

00:33:09.769 --> 00:33:15.210
So, just like you were saying, how hard it is to get that information out there for just nonprofits.

00:33:15.369 --> 00:33:28.490
Imagine how hard it is to get those resources to those military, you know, members and family that are experiencing these types of abuses to so that they can recognize what they are.

00:33:28.730 --> 00:33:31.690
Um and that's another key goal.

00:33:31.849 --> 00:33:37.450
I think that the military has improved on by having family readiness officers.

00:33:37.609 --> 00:33:48.169
And another thing is, I don't know if many of your service, uh, sorry, I was gonna say service members, many of your listeners know is that a lot of uh military organizations have ombudsmen.

00:33:48.409 --> 00:34:05.769
And they're usually a married member to a service member that acts as a third-party, non-judgmental, to give you resources if you're having problems, to be that conduit between you, the married member, and to the command.

00:34:06.089 --> 00:34:22.170
So there are resources, but again, if we don't get that out there and let them know that these exist and there are safety measures in place to keep one, their autonomy and uh two, their privacy, then they won't feel comfortable, you know.

00:34:22.329 --> 00:34:32.570
Like there's a lot of uh stigma attached to being that problem family or that family down the street that you always hear screaming and yelling, but nobody does anything about.

00:34:32.730 --> 00:34:36.329
It's very important that we intervene, especially for children.

00:34:36.570 --> 00:34:40.090
The children can't um defend themselves.

00:34:40.250 --> 00:34:50.570
So if you ever see a situation, just really uh I implore you to have the courage to step in in one way or another.

00:34:51.050 --> 00:34:54.490
Yeah, I think too many people are concerned about getting it wrong.

00:34:54.730 --> 00:34:54.889
Yeah.

00:34:55.210 --> 00:35:04.570
And how do you think we can better identify early warning signs that a military family is struggling, especially like you said, with the with the children and the and the spouses.

00:35:05.210 --> 00:35:11.369
So one thing that, again, I have to give the military credit for is that they're doing climate surveys.

00:35:11.529 --> 00:35:27.449
On the flip side of that, sometimes people don't want to be honest on those climate surveys because, you know, they don't feel it's very uh they say that they're um what do you say, they're private, they're confidential, and that uh no one, no one's name goes on it or anything like that.

00:35:27.610 --> 00:35:33.130
But there's a lot of, you know, recognizing that sometimes your privacy isn't really covered.

00:35:33.289 --> 00:35:42.090
Uh but those climate surveys exist so they can recognize uh how much need is in that particular unit or where they can provide that.

00:35:42.329 --> 00:35:45.610
USOs, they're phenomenal resources.

00:35:45.690 --> 00:35:52.489
They do food drives, they do clothing drives, they have uh backpacks for kids when you go back to school.

00:35:52.730 --> 00:36:01.369
Um I think the biggest way to really answer this question is to just somehow flood that information out there.

00:36:01.610 --> 00:36:12.969
Like uh through the kids' clubs, through the military kids clubs at the school, have a flyer, you know, post it on the command website, you know, really highlight access to care.

00:36:13.690 --> 00:36:15.210
That's the best way.

00:36:15.690 --> 00:36:21.449
That's the best way to get that out there is just talking and talking and talking and just talking.

00:36:22.170 --> 00:36:28.969
I was gonna say, like just witnessing the people and telling them about it and having the conversation sometimes will plant the seed.

00:36:29.130 --> 00:36:44.090
Um, they may not do it today or tomorrow overnight, um, or this week even, but getting them thinking about it and getting them to a point to where they get the courage to get the help that they need um is really helpful.

00:36:44.170 --> 00:36:50.090
And that that really hits home for me, because like I said, growing up as a military brat, there was a lot of things behind closed doors.

00:36:50.250 --> 00:36:52.090
Um, I struggled in school.

00:36:52.250 --> 00:36:57.289
I mean, I'm about to talk about something else that you were uh, which is a special education teacher.

00:36:57.449 --> 00:37:11.449
I was in special ed for nine, nine grades, um, mainly because my home life was just so unstable and um it was hard for me to sh to focus at school because I just didn't know what I was coming home to.

00:37:11.769 --> 00:37:25.449
So uh talking to you, I'm I'm very much relating to the things that you're talking about with the family part and um the special ed uh I guess uh resume part of you.

00:37:25.690 --> 00:37:36.009
What did that uh teach you about advocacy, patience, and family dynamics that now that you're now bringing into your social work career?

00:37:36.329 --> 00:37:39.769
So when I was teaching, I hadn't had children yet.

00:37:40.090 --> 00:37:48.170
And the one thing I will say, I did self-contained the the label was emotionally disturbed.

00:37:48.409 --> 00:37:57.690
But what I really learned probably I kind of see it when you're sharing too, is that my kids didn't have learning disabilities.

00:37:57.929 --> 00:38:02.250
The reason why they were labeled emotionally disturbed is because they exhibited anger.

00:38:02.409 --> 00:38:05.529
And in children, fear, anger.

00:38:05.769 --> 00:38:07.610
Sadness turns into anger.

00:38:07.690 --> 00:38:10.809
You know, it's a default emotion.

00:38:11.049 --> 00:38:17.210
They don't know how to navigate, they don't have what they call a toolbox of emotional intelligence.

00:38:17.449 --> 00:38:19.529
They they learn from what they see.

00:38:19.690 --> 00:38:39.529
And if they don't have someone helping them be emotionally intelligent, you know, having that ability to say, I feel this way because, and when they witness someone when they're angry or when they're upset and they only know zero to a hundred, they're gonna express themselves the only way they know how.

00:38:40.009 --> 00:39:02.570
And so that was a real eye-opener for me is like navigating, I'm educating these amazing children, and their biggest barrier is their uh ability to um control their emotions because no one's shown them how and to really be accepting because it's easy.

00:39:02.730 --> 00:39:04.329
Let me tell you, I see this all the time.

00:39:04.730 --> 00:39:11.769
You see a kid, he's acting like a brat, and someone says, Oh, that's the parent's fault, or oh, that's no, that's not the case.

00:39:11.929 --> 00:39:12.730
That's not the case.

00:39:12.809 --> 00:39:22.650
They're judging this kid, he's a child and they're just condemning him and putting him down for his behavior without understanding that that's a default response.

00:39:22.889 --> 00:39:36.090
If we as adults, when we're driving, become angry at some random person because of perceived uh misunderstanding, and we expect children to act like adults, that is that's a grave injustice.

00:39:36.250 --> 00:39:48.409
So that's one thing I really learned as a special education teacher that just because you see someone presenting a certain way, it doesn't mean that that's how they're defined.

00:39:48.650 --> 00:39:53.130
So it really gave me insight to understand deeper.

00:39:53.449 --> 00:39:56.730
And those kids, they made me a better person.

00:39:56.889 --> 00:39:59.529
They I miss it.

00:39:59.690 --> 00:40:02.489
I miss teaching, I miss engaging with them.

00:40:02.969 --> 00:40:09.610
And I would have to say that's the biggest thing I learned is that empathy is not a weakness.

00:40:09.690 --> 00:40:11.449
It's a strength, it's a strength.

00:40:12.170 --> 00:40:12.409
Right.

00:40:12.570 --> 00:40:14.009
And we should hold on to that.

00:40:14.809 --> 00:40:15.210
Yeah.

00:40:15.449 --> 00:40:15.849
Yeah.

00:40:16.329 --> 00:40:29.769
I always wondered if I always wondered what my special ed teachers thought about me because I was so lazy that I wouldn't even I would take my work and I would just throw it away in the trash and I wouldn't do it.

00:40:29.929 --> 00:40:33.449
Or I would just scribble on it and just do whatever, because I didn't want to do any of it.

00:40:33.690 --> 00:40:36.730
And I always wondered if they ever thought for a second.

00:40:37.049 --> 00:40:40.809
I wonder if they if they ever thought that is this kid just dumb?

00:40:41.049 --> 00:40:42.889
Is this kid just not smart?

00:40:43.130 --> 00:40:48.730
Or is this kid have issues at home that we don't know about?

00:40:48.889 --> 00:40:50.329
They never asked me about that.

00:40:50.489 --> 00:40:54.009
It was never about what happened from 3 p.m.

00:40:54.409 --> 00:40:55.289
to 7 a.m.

00:40:55.529 --> 00:40:56.009
the next morning.

00:40:56.090 --> 00:40:59.289
It was never about But again, this was in the eighties and nineties.

00:40:59.369 --> 00:41:04.650
So much different time uh time frame, different mentality of everything.

00:41:04.809 --> 00:41:15.049
But I always wondered um because it took me years to to understand, it got to a point where I tested out of special ed in ninth grade because of embarrassment.

00:41:15.210 --> 00:41:22.650
I got tired of going to the special classroom and the you know, everyone's labeled, right?

00:41:22.730 --> 00:41:29.049
And I got tired of getting made fun of, and and so I I tested out of it and my life started um bouncing out.

00:41:29.210 --> 00:41:40.650
But um I don't know if uh special ed today is the same as it was back in the 80s or how different it is now versus then, now versus you know, the way it was back then.

00:41:40.889 --> 00:41:47.690
But I just think it's fascinating that you have that perspective and you can take that into your social work side of things.

00:41:47.849 --> 00:41:50.650
Um and what what made you step into social work?

00:41:50.809 --> 00:41:57.610
Was there a particular a particular moment or a case that shifted your your path?

00:41:58.489 --> 00:42:01.529
It was I missed teaching.

00:42:01.690 --> 00:42:02.489
I miss teaching.

00:42:02.570 --> 00:42:14.250
And in California, um the education path here is very different, like the ability to get into, back into education, getting recertified.

00:42:14.489 --> 00:42:27.849
And I just realized I could reach more people and do greater things outside of the education scope for military families as a social worker.

00:42:28.090 --> 00:42:31.690
So teachers, they're the foundations, they're the rocks.

00:42:31.849 --> 00:42:45.369
If I could do anything, I would go to Congress and be like, we need to promote teachers, they need raises, we need to, you know, really support our system because they're the first line of defense when it comes to our children.

00:42:45.529 --> 00:42:48.889
Just like you said, I wonder, you know, is the teacher recognizing this?

00:42:49.049 --> 00:42:50.570
Is the teacher recognizing that?

00:42:50.809 --> 00:42:57.369
So having been in school in the 80s as well, you know, the education system has shifted a lot.

00:42:57.690 --> 00:43:20.889
And um, you know, I can't speak for your past uh special education teachers, but just for myself, I know that a lot of special education teachers don't go into special education without having an empathetic uh access, like wanting to really reach someone where they're at, when they're ready for that to be reached at.

00:43:21.289 --> 00:43:24.730
And we see things differently when we're kids versus adults, right?

00:43:24.809 --> 00:43:34.250
Are we are, you know, hear her do that where you look back into a point in your life and you're like, you finally are able to see other people's motivators too.

00:43:34.409 --> 00:43:40.650
So you're like, oh my gosh, now I get why my mom or dad or cousin or friend acted that way.

00:43:40.730 --> 00:43:41.369
I get it now.

00:43:41.529 --> 00:43:46.809
I had the life experience to see that situation from a different perspective.

00:43:47.130 --> 00:43:47.449
Right.

00:43:47.690 --> 00:44:03.049
Um, so I'm really motivated to be like, I think to be honest, I became a social worker a little bit selfishly because I didn't want uh some people to have to experience what I experienced without guidance.

00:44:03.289 --> 00:44:15.769
You know, having been that young service member, female in the military, I want to ensure other females that are in the military know certain things or be prepared for certain things or have access to certain resources.

00:44:15.929 --> 00:44:27.849
And then as a spouse, to make sure that my service member spouses have access and to resources and that their children also have access to resources.

00:44:28.009 --> 00:44:42.329
Um, like you were saying, being in school and being in special education, making sure that our spouses' kids have access to tutors, to have access to funding for after school activities, to learn that there are even programs during the summer.

00:44:42.489 --> 00:44:47.130
Operation Purple does a one-week free summer camp.

00:44:47.369 --> 00:44:56.090
Um, and also there are many others that do uh services for summer camps for free for military and veteran children.

00:44:56.170 --> 00:45:01.449
And I think if we don't get out there and share that, who's gonna do it?

00:45:01.610 --> 00:45:03.049
So I was like, you know what?

00:45:03.289 --> 00:45:09.610
I've been through a lot on both sides, and I just thought, you know what, let me do that.

00:45:09.769 --> 00:45:14.889
If I can the military is gonna send me back to school for my master's in social work, perfect.

00:45:15.049 --> 00:45:19.690
Give me this umbrella and I'm gonna use it for the military, you know?

00:45:19.929 --> 00:45:21.049
Just put it forward.

00:45:21.289 --> 00:45:21.929
I think it's awesome.

00:45:22.009 --> 00:45:24.730
And by the way, before I move on, I want to say you're a fantastic speaker.

00:45:24.889 --> 00:45:26.009
Oh you're a fantastic speaker.

00:45:26.170 --> 00:45:26.730
I'm nervous.

00:45:26.969 --> 00:45:27.529
I'm so nervous.

00:45:27.769 --> 00:45:28.489
No, you're not at all.

00:45:29.210 --> 00:45:31.049
We didn't talk about what we're gonna talk about today.

00:45:31.130 --> 00:45:34.570
We can't just tell, we were just like, I was like, You're great.

00:45:34.650 --> 00:45:35.769
You're great at what you're doing.

00:45:35.929 --> 00:45:46.809
If anyone out there is listening and and they know someone that's going into the military, whether they're a military spouse or they're the actual veteran, because you've seen both sides of it.

00:45:46.969 --> 00:45:47.289
Yeah.

00:45:47.529 --> 00:46:01.849
What advice would you give them pre-joining or maybe joining now, uh, for them to set themselves up for success professionally and personally?

00:46:02.809 --> 00:46:12.489
Okay, so for like say a young person just getting out of high school, going into the military, I would tell them to go beyond their recruiter.

00:46:12.809 --> 00:46:20.170
Like, really find someone who's in the military, talk to them, like, what exactly is that job?

00:46:20.409 --> 00:46:23.369
It's one thing on paper, one thing in reality.

00:46:23.610 --> 00:46:29.449
So, and also ask yourself like, is this something that I'm gonna want to be doing five years, 10 years?

00:46:29.610 --> 00:46:33.849
And even if not, if it's something you just want to experience and try it now, go for it.

00:46:33.929 --> 00:46:40.650
You can always um have the opportunity to reclass, like change your job later on.

00:46:40.889 --> 00:46:44.889
But the the key is to go in with your eyes wide open.

00:46:45.130 --> 00:46:53.210
Um, the second part is if you've already been in the military and you got out and you realized maybe civilian life isn't for me.

00:46:53.369 --> 00:46:54.329
I want to go back in.

00:46:54.489 --> 00:47:03.849
Realize that there are other opportunities, just like you had mentioned earlier from that one service member that learned about the uh opportunity to go from enlisted to officer.

00:47:04.009 --> 00:47:05.529
There are other opportunities like that.

00:47:05.690 --> 00:47:16.250
The guard is very good at uh taking in students and commissioning them early and getting the groundwork in and then training them so they can be effective leaders later on.

00:47:16.570 --> 00:47:18.489
So I would promote that.

00:47:18.730 --> 00:47:25.769
I would promote also spouses to take advantage of the spousal education programs that are there.

00:47:26.009 --> 00:47:37.130
There is uh one university, I think it's called uh Coastline Community College that offers very discounted courses for young enlisted like E1 to E4.

00:47:37.610 --> 00:47:40.009
Uh, I would say take advantage of that.

00:47:40.409 --> 00:47:47.210
If you're in the military now and you're in E1, E2, E3, start your education now.

00:47:47.610 --> 00:47:49.130
It won't wait for you.

00:47:49.289 --> 00:47:57.849
Yeah, explore your life, take diving, cliff dive, jump out of airplanes, do whatever you want to do, but take a class here, there.

00:47:58.090 --> 00:48:06.409
Start building your educational foundation because you will get out of the military at some point and you will have to figure out that next step.

00:48:06.570 --> 00:48:13.769
And even if it's not in the degree field you got, at least you have that foundation in which to build from.

00:48:14.170 --> 00:48:21.690
So the biggest thing I would promote is save your money and get that education.

00:48:21.849 --> 00:48:23.929
The military offers that.

00:48:24.329 --> 00:48:27.210
That's the one thing you should not miss out on.

00:48:27.529 --> 00:48:29.449
Get educated.

00:48:30.009 --> 00:48:30.329
Yeah.

00:48:30.570 --> 00:48:30.809
Yeah.

00:48:31.049 --> 00:48:33.130
I always tell people the military is not bad.

00:48:33.210 --> 00:48:35.130
And military gets a bad rap a lot of times.

00:48:35.289 --> 00:48:42.570
First of all, people go into the military with their pre-existing issues and they think that the military is going to fix it for them, and it doesn't.

00:48:42.730 --> 00:48:54.090
It just magnifies it because they give you a paycheck, they take you far away from your family, put you in a strange land with strange people, and the problems that you had at home are now following you.

00:48:54.329 --> 00:49:04.009
Um, and then secondly, the other the other part to that is that a lot of folks go in and they get out, and then they're upset that they can't find a job.

00:49:04.730 --> 00:49:08.090
Well, while you were in, did you ever go to the education center?

00:49:08.250 --> 00:49:10.650
Like, I understand you want to party and you want to go out.

00:49:10.889 --> 00:49:12.250
That's what Friday nights are for.

00:49:12.489 --> 00:49:22.650
Spend your Saturdays at the education center, work hard, play hard, manage your military career in a sense of like don't just rely on your MOS, but utilize the other resources.

00:49:22.730 --> 00:49:36.250
Like, I'm a part of ActNow Education, and we go out, raise money, and then we turn around and we purchase credits, certifications, um, and we give those to our military community, active duty, veterans, military spouses.

00:49:36.650 --> 00:49:45.369
And it just always surprises me how uninformed people are that once you get back into the civilian world, a lot of places won't care what MOS you had.

00:49:45.529 --> 00:49:54.090
They'll wave the flag and go, yeah, we we love military veterans here, but then they'll go then they'll say, then they'll say, All right, let's get into the meat potatoes of what you have on your resume.

00:49:54.250 --> 00:49:57.369
And then they look at it like, we don't know what any of this stuff means.

00:49:57.690 --> 00:49:58.090
Yeah.

00:49:58.409 --> 00:50:02.650
I will say um that's what we do when we're young.

00:50:02.809 --> 00:50:03.769
We're dumb.

00:50:04.009 --> 00:50:06.570
We party, we go out.

00:50:06.730 --> 00:50:11.690
I mean, I think who I don't know who said this, but they said youth is wasted on the young.

00:50:11.849 --> 00:50:12.650
It really is.

00:50:12.889 --> 00:50:14.090
And that's okay.

00:50:14.329 --> 00:50:21.289
That's I I want to give this one thing about joining the military young, it's a safe space to grow up in, right?

00:50:21.529 --> 00:50:27.369
You know when to wake up, you know when to go to work, you know when to go to bed, you know where to get food, you know, you get a paycheck.

00:50:27.529 --> 00:50:32.489
You know, that's one thing the military provides is that consistency.

00:50:32.650 --> 00:50:41.610
So, like you were saying, a lot of people come in with their problems from their childhood, and then it does get masked because it gets covered by work and friends and life.

00:50:41.849 --> 00:50:43.210
Structure, structure.

00:50:43.610 --> 00:50:46.889
And then you're right, and then they're getting ready, they're ready to get out.

00:50:46.969 --> 00:50:49.049
They want to go in the real world, but guess what?

00:50:49.289 --> 00:50:56.329
That structure, that someone telling them time to get up, time to go to work, time to go to the gym, time to go home.

00:50:56.570 --> 00:50:59.289
Here's your money, every paycheck.

00:50:59.449 --> 00:51:02.650
Oh, here's medical, here's dental, you know.

00:51:02.809 --> 00:51:06.489
So that's one thing the military is great for, you know.

00:51:06.650 --> 00:51:09.289
Do you do you remember those old commercials when you were overseas?

00:51:09.449 --> 00:51:10.730
Is it what was it called?

00:51:10.809 --> 00:51:11.289
What was it called?

00:51:11.449 --> 00:51:12.409
Nazi SPAN.

00:51:12.570 --> 00:51:13.130
What was that?

00:51:13.529 --> 00:51:15.929
Uh the Armed Forces Network, AFARS.

00:51:16.489 --> 00:51:17.529
The satellite one.

00:51:17.929 --> 00:51:19.210
You know, those commercials.

00:51:19.369 --> 00:51:27.369
There would be one commercial was brushing, encouraging people to brush their teeth, you know, and one commercial was there was a dad throwing a baseball to his son.

00:51:27.529 --> 00:51:34.009
Hey, don't forget, you know, family, you know, because military members, that's that's the one of the dangers.

00:51:34.090 --> 00:51:36.809
You know, we get caught up in our work, caught up in our work, caught up in our work.

00:51:36.889 --> 00:51:40.090
We're there more than half our our day.

00:51:40.409 --> 00:51:48.650
And so these commercials were like, hey, buddy, you got a family, play ball with your kid, or hey, you know, it's your turn to leave work.

00:51:48.889 --> 00:51:51.289
You got to take your kid to the dentist, it's your job.

00:51:51.529 --> 00:52:03.449
Um, so that's one thing that the military is great for is like creating a structure, but it doesn't teach them to create that structure for themselves outside of the military.

00:52:03.610 --> 00:52:10.409
And that is where, you know, when you're going through your transition program, like, okay, six months till you get out.

00:52:10.650 --> 00:52:11.529
Here's some paper.

00:52:11.610 --> 00:52:13.849
They're just throwing papers at you, you know?

00:52:14.009 --> 00:52:20.009
Uh, and what they really need is another adult telling another adult, okay, here's a budget.

00:52:20.250 --> 00:52:22.329
I want you to create a pretend budget.

00:52:22.409 --> 00:52:22.809
You're out.

00:52:22.969 --> 00:52:23.849
How much is your rent?

00:52:24.009 --> 00:52:24.969
How much is your mortgage?

00:52:25.130 --> 00:52:26.250
How much is your car insurance?

00:52:26.329 --> 00:52:27.130
How much is medical?

00:52:27.210 --> 00:52:28.009
How much is dental?

00:52:28.170 --> 00:52:28.809
How long till you get?

00:52:30.009 --> 00:52:33.929
Just hearing that, you're like, somebody probably tuned us off right now, just walked away.

00:52:34.009 --> 00:52:35.690
I'm like, I know we got time for that mess.

00:52:35.849 --> 00:52:37.210
But that's the reality.

00:52:37.449 --> 00:52:43.369
That is also that white noise is what the military spouse deals with all the time.

00:52:44.170 --> 00:52:45.130
All the time.

00:52:45.289 --> 00:52:48.650
Kids going to school, kids going to the dentist, kids getting this, kids getting that.

00:52:48.730 --> 00:52:49.769
Oh, did we get groceries?

00:52:49.849 --> 00:52:50.409
Did we pay this?

00:52:50.489 --> 00:52:51.210
Did we grit that?

00:52:51.289 --> 00:52:52.329
Oh, we ran out of this.

00:52:52.489 --> 00:52:54.650
And now the service members got to hear that too.

00:52:54.730 --> 00:52:56.250
And they're like, it's overwhelming.

00:52:56.409 --> 00:53:04.730
That's why we have so many adjustment disorders, or you know, it's it's uh it's a failure to launch, essentially.

00:53:04.889 --> 00:53:15.210
You know, we haven't when I say we, I mean the military's done a great disservice in teaching or uh forcing, I guess, education in budget management.

00:53:15.449 --> 00:53:16.730
We need to teach.

00:53:16.809 --> 00:53:28.329
Um, if we're gonna take the responsibility of having them, you know, and saying, hey, we own you now, then we have a responsibility to educate them on how to survive without us.

00:53:28.570 --> 00:53:32.489
You know, that's one thing the military's really kind of dropped the ball on.

00:53:32.650 --> 00:53:32.730
Right.

00:53:32.969 --> 00:53:42.170
You know, doing a one-weekend class or a two-week class before we kick them out of the military is not supporting them, you know, it's like, here's some paperwork.

00:53:42.409 --> 00:53:47.929
Yeah, you know, that's where that's where I think that's where a lot of our military people get in trouble.

00:53:48.090 --> 00:53:53.369
And that's where a lot of families start hitting walls because that's a lot of noise.

00:53:53.529 --> 00:53:54.809
That's a lot of noise to deal with.

00:53:54.889 --> 00:54:02.730
And without gaining the skill set to do it, we're not uh it's like pulling the tablecloth out, right?

00:54:02.889 --> 00:54:05.849
Underneath you're like, whoa, you know, everything just kind of falls apart.

00:54:07.529 --> 00:54:08.889
Totally makes sense.

00:54:09.210 --> 00:54:17.529
Elaine, I don't want to speak for you, but I assume this is the beginning of building your social media presence, I would hope.

00:54:17.769 --> 00:54:20.570
Um would are would you agree with that or no?

00:54:21.049 --> 00:54:24.969
Before speaking with you, I honestly hadn't considered it.

00:54:25.289 --> 00:54:33.130
I had just been really happy in my life, just going out, talking to MS people, and you've given me a lot of focus.

00:54:33.289 --> 00:54:38.329
And I think, yes, I I'm ready to do that.

00:54:38.489 --> 00:54:48.730
I want to be loud and out there and just give them what I can and learn from others that are doing it as well, and just really gaining some insight.

00:54:48.889 --> 00:54:50.489
So I want to say thank you again.

00:54:50.650 --> 00:54:58.969
This has been a really good experience uh and an opportunity to tell people that you can be a thousand different things.

00:54:59.130 --> 00:55:02.730
There isn't, and you're never too old to shift gears.

00:55:02.889 --> 00:55:06.650
You know, you join at 18, you join at 32, you do one job.

00:55:06.809 --> 00:55:07.529
That's great.

00:55:07.690 --> 00:55:21.610
You know, you can go be, you can be in the military, you can be an admin person, you can do military police, you can work in protocol, and then you can turn around, be enlisted, you know, get be a civilian and be a teacher, and then go back in and get a social work degree, and then go back in and be an officer.

00:55:21.769 --> 00:55:23.529
You can do anything.

00:55:23.929 --> 00:55:31.449
And the only true barrier to that would be yourself and finding those resources to support you and making that happen.

00:55:31.610 --> 00:55:32.329
So, yes.

00:55:32.650 --> 00:55:45.690
You have an you have an amazing arc, and it deserves to be shared for sure because you started out enlisted in the Navy, then got married, had kids, got out, then decided to go back in.

00:55:45.849 --> 00:55:48.090
You went in as an officer in the National Guard.

00:55:48.250 --> 00:55:48.650
Yeah.

00:55:48.809 --> 00:55:51.849
Um, oh, didn't mention special ed teacher.

00:55:51.929 --> 00:55:53.610
You're a special education teacher.

00:55:53.769 --> 00:55:59.929
Uh, then you got your LCSW, went into social work uh in the National Guard and full-time.

00:56:00.090 --> 00:56:02.250
So it's like you do all these different things.

00:56:02.329 --> 00:56:06.809
You have all these different categories that you fit uh and you can speak on.

00:56:06.969 --> 00:56:15.369
So at the end of the day, I I really see a lot of value in uh in the experience that that you should share with others.

00:56:15.529 --> 00:56:24.969
Um throughout your career, life, or experiences or whatever, what what's one success story, big or small, that reminds you that your work truly matters?

00:56:25.369 --> 00:56:28.409
It's always the ones you least expect to have impacted.

00:56:28.570 --> 00:56:32.090
We have to be really mindful uh that words are powerful.

00:56:32.570 --> 00:56:40.969
And um sometimes when we speak, we could be very um indifferent or callous or short or rude.

00:56:41.449 --> 00:56:48.969
And I think uh I I've been guilty of that where I've been tired and someone said something, and I'm just really dismissive.

00:56:49.369 --> 00:56:56.969
And I think that it one of those moments where I was dismissive, I turned around and saw the person's face just drop.

00:56:57.529 --> 00:57:04.090
And that was kind of gut-wrenching for me because that's not who I want to be.

00:57:04.250 --> 00:57:16.650
And so I think those are powerful moments is to recognize to one, forgive ourselves when we're that person, that we get tired and we get short and we can sometimes drop the ball.

00:57:16.969 --> 00:57:22.250
But also uh when we recognize that, pick the ball back up and hand it to them.

00:57:22.409 --> 00:57:25.690
I think that for me is it.

00:57:25.849 --> 00:57:30.650
And I think the other biggest thing is I I really want to highlight being a mom.

00:57:30.809 --> 00:57:46.250
I think the biggest motivator for me is that telling my kids that by through example, like you, you're not not just saying you're not limited, but showing them like you're not limited, like this is it.

00:57:46.409 --> 00:57:48.090
Like you want to try that?

00:57:48.250 --> 00:57:48.969
Let's do it.

00:57:49.130 --> 00:57:55.130
You know, never say, not the never say never, but never say no until you've tried it.

00:57:55.369 --> 00:57:57.849
You know, go through it and know.

00:57:58.090 --> 00:58:01.449
I think the hardest thing to recognize is that things don't come easy.

00:58:01.529 --> 00:58:02.409
It's gonna be hard.

00:58:02.489 --> 00:58:03.289
It's gonna be hard.

00:58:03.449 --> 00:58:05.449
It's gonna be hard until it's easy.

00:58:05.690 --> 00:58:11.289
And I think a lot of people uh that I meet now, they're like, oh, I tried it, it didn't work.

00:58:11.449 --> 00:58:12.489
Oh, I did that.

00:58:12.570 --> 00:58:15.690
They didn't respond, or oh, I don't know why it's not working.

00:58:15.849 --> 00:58:18.650
Well, you did it once, you did it twice.

00:58:18.969 --> 00:58:21.929
You gotta go, like you said earlier, you gotta go through the suck.

00:58:22.090 --> 00:58:24.809
You just gotta go through the suck.

00:58:25.049 --> 00:58:33.929
You can't jump over hurdles, you can't slide underneath them, you gotta go through them, or else you don't experience the truth.

00:58:34.570 --> 00:58:39.130
And so anyone I meet, they're like, oh, this or that.

00:58:39.210 --> 00:58:40.409
I'm like, did you go through it?

00:58:40.489 --> 00:58:41.610
They're like, no, I tried it.

00:58:41.769 --> 00:58:44.730
No, you gotta go through the suck, through it.

00:58:44.889 --> 00:58:51.690
It's gonna be ugly, it's gonna be nasty, it's gonna be dirty, but only then when you get on the other side, you'll have that pride.

00:58:51.849 --> 00:58:53.929
You did it, you survived it, you gained it.

00:58:54.090 --> 00:58:55.529
Nothing comes overnight.

00:58:55.769 --> 00:58:56.409
Yeah.

00:58:56.889 --> 00:58:58.250
Yeah, I think that's huge.

00:58:58.489 --> 00:59:05.769
You you and Gina should get together and start start doing some uh some social media stuff or start combining some of your ideas and your creativity.

00:59:05.849 --> 00:59:06.809
I think that'd be really cool.

00:59:07.130 --> 00:59:07.769
Oh, thank you.

00:59:07.849 --> 00:59:09.849
I'd love to work with her, that'd be great.

00:59:10.090 --> 00:59:10.570
Yeah.

00:59:10.809 --> 00:59:16.809
Um so I just wanted to round this out and uh mention too that you are on LinkedIn.

00:59:17.130 --> 00:59:17.769
Yes.

00:59:18.329 --> 00:59:21.369
So if people want to connect with you, they can connect with you there on LinkedIn.

00:59:21.449 --> 00:59:23.929
And I'll, you know, obviously your name will be on this podcast.

00:59:24.730 --> 00:59:34.009
Uh in the future, I hope to see you more involved and evolved as far as putting your messages out there.

00:59:34.650 --> 00:59:43.929
Um what's one message that you wish every military spouse, partner, uh, or parent could hear directly from you today?

00:59:44.250 --> 00:59:46.250
That's a heavy, just one, huh?

00:59:46.650 --> 00:59:50.090
Um There's so many, but there is so many.

00:59:50.250 --> 00:59:54.570
And it's gonna sound oh, you you hear it all the time.

00:59:54.730 --> 00:59:55.529
You hear it all the time.

00:59:55.610 --> 00:59:56.250
You're not alone.

00:59:56.650 --> 00:59:57.449
You're not alone.

00:59:57.690 --> 00:59:59.929
And you're in and you gotta fight through that embarrassment.

01:00:00.090 --> 01:00:15.849
If you're embarrassed, you're experiencing anything, or you feel any kind of shame, don't uh reach out, touch base, um, and don't stop until you get the support you need or you find the tribe that supports you so you can excel.

01:00:15.929 --> 01:00:26.730
There are some great I've met and been supported by some amazing um women and men who are spouses to military members.

01:00:27.049 --> 01:00:31.449
And without them, I wouldn't have uh survived some school years.

01:00:31.610 --> 01:00:33.690
You know, they reach out.

01:00:33.849 --> 01:00:36.329
That's the greatest thing I could tell anyone.

01:00:36.650 --> 01:00:37.929
Um, do that.

01:00:38.090 --> 01:00:44.809
Because the when you reach out, even the smallest hand can carry the greatest weight off of someone's shoulder.

01:00:44.969 --> 01:00:48.329
So please, please, that's yeah, that's it.

01:00:48.489 --> 01:00:49.369
Reach out.

01:00:49.849 --> 01:00:59.849
I think the one thing that you'll find in your journey with uh growing online is you're gonna find a tribe, and sometimes that's That tribe uh lives hundreds of miles away from you.

01:01:00.090 --> 01:01:06.170
Some of the best people that I know uh live on the other side of the map, on the other side of the United States.

01:01:06.250 --> 01:01:08.409
Um, but they're some of my biggest supporters.

01:01:08.489 --> 01:01:12.570
So, Elaine, I hope that uh I hope that you continue this trend.

01:01:12.650 --> 01:01:15.849
I hope that you continue putting yourself out there and being courageous.

01:01:16.009 --> 01:01:20.009
Um, it's been an absolute honor talking to you, and thank you for giving me your time today.

01:01:20.329 --> 01:01:21.049
Thank you as well.

01:01:21.289 --> 01:01:30.650
For everyone else out there, uh, Formation Nation, remember survivability starts with awareness, and sometimes the strongest warriors are the ones holding the home front together.

01:01:30.889 --> 01:01:32.409
Thank you so much for tuning in today.

01:01:32.570 --> 01:01:37.929
Until next time, I want you to stay tuned, stay focused, and stay motivated.

01:01:38.250 --> 01:01:39.849
Warriors, fall out.